Criticism & Forgiveness

There are two things in life that fascinate me, namely criticism and forgiveness. Based on my personal experience and perception criticism and forgiveness help me to keep everything in perspective.

I am an information junkie, I enjoy reading about new developments. It often annoys me how the news media tend to emphasise how a matter was dealt with wrongly. It does not matter what it was or how important. Some person or some organisation fucked up (again) and “we” the media keep repeating it.

Otherwise the news media confirm or describe events or trends. It does not happen often that I read news that is simply about how well someone did unless an athlete wins medals.

I am also aware of my Dutch roots. Dutch directness really means that as a native Dutchie I will say what I think of whatever I want to comment on. When something is good, I say “great idea, let’s do this!”. When something is less than acceptable I have to think about how to express myself without coming across as either a know-it-all and, or without verbally destroying it. In my experience most native Dutchies are simply used to the direct and honest approach and often find it clears up miscommunication and misunderstanding.

Over the years in perceiving, interpreting and analysing for myself how people and media respond to their environment and given situations I have learned many lessons. I made mistakes and sometimes I was successful. Two human acts always stayed central and one became more important over time as I learnt about life.

To criticise helps to question why a particular event takes place and why a particular choice was made. To ask the question is to find the answer and finding answers can lead to understanding in general. When the criticism leads to more understanding and opportunities for improvement that is beneficial.

The most important act for me through the years has been to forgive. To forgive is not an act for just the religious among us. To forgive is to say “I accept what happened and whether or not I understand why, I see no benefit in claiming personal revenge”. Often I find that when I am either angered or annoyed there is no benefit in staying angry or annoyed. I just want to find a solution, move on and live the remainder of my life.

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