Scars and Tears

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A reminder of what was once whole.

There are days when scars and tears of past events lead you to make a decision. They are the reminder of what you had to go through to make to the end and say “(for) now it is over.” Even seemingly indecisive people become resolute and decide because not deciding is not an option. Thus this post is about what I associate with scars and tears.

The things you survive tend to brush off or leave a deeper trace. Sometimes a wound leads to a scar and sometimes something is torn off which leads to a remnant. How each person deals with this is personal. How many wounds and tears a person can bear is also personal. I always wonder where my limit is. Physically I know exactly where. Mentally and emotionally the limit is not always clear.

It is very easy to say a priori “here is my limit” but a posteriori  you are sometimes likely to say “for you I will make an exception.” It is a human thing that keeps happening and makes people give other people second chances and lucky breaks. To not be completely rational about mental and emotional limits kind of defines human history, the good stories and the exiting twists and turns in narratives.

Here is the thing though, when mentally and emotionally you refuse to take more the big “no!” appears. When that happens it now longer matters who says what, what is happening and how much the scars and tears hurt. When that happens you make a final stand and say “no!” as if to place a giant wall that is unbreakable.

In the recent months I said “no!” to many things. The scars and tears became too many. Too much at once and you are on your own. Today I closed some chapters of those months and some people will not return. No more complaints and life goes on as time heals the inflictions of events. I survive, recover and move on to a better future.

Scars and tears…